In today's The Embodied Podcast episode I unpack the Marion Woodman quote,
"Until the ego feels its own despair, there is little motivation to change."
I discuss the relativization of the ego to the mysterious forces that are influencing it.
Many of us live our lives prioritizing the rationalizations of the ego rather than creating a relationship with the wisdom within the emotions that knock on the egos door.
What is ego avoiding despair?
👉Thinking only in solutions.
👉Prioritizing the needs/demands of those around us without regard for our own needs
👉Making decisions based on what we “should” do.
👉Having a conditional relationship with our emotions. If the emotion doesn’t make sense, we invalidate it.
Why would we do this??
👉We did not adequately learn emotional intelligence as a child
👉We had high expectations placed on us at a young age so we repressed our feelings to become who and what we needed to be to receive love and validation.
👉Performance based validation was the only form of explicit validation. Examples: academic/athletic success, career accomplishments, etc. Ya know, typical hustle culture.
❤️Usually living this way works for many…until it doesn’t anymore.
Until we hit a point where what we used to be able do for validation pushes us further into dysfunction.
It becomes impossible to bypass the truth of loss and grief that is needed to be faced.
Both of which can be painful, while also being transformative.
Sometimes what has be grieved is the death/transformation of:
👉who we thought we needed to be (our survival adaptations)
👉what we thought mattered most (our value systems)
Allowing space for these to die and be reborn anew is a way through.
This is an important time to move from living in an egocentric, top down way into a body first bottom up way.
This can direct us into our deepest wisdom & healing.
Attuning to the body can offer a space of peace that money and outer success could never offer.
And it takes radical courage to shift from hustling for your worth into settling into the wisdom of your body.
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